Baby at the sea side

18 Jul

As an adult, more precisely as a red-haired adult, going to the beach is a crusade. 50+ sunscreen to put on every 2 hours. Long sleeved anything or a pareo to cover your entire you from the entire sun. A towel. A hat. Sun glasses. Don’t go to the beach between 12pm and 5pm and preferably not even after 11am and not until 7pm. Don’t use oil, water, sand, foil paper or anything that can reflect light on you. Stay covered at all times and if you have any freckles (yes, we red haired people are usually covered in them) make sure to have them checked yearly and do your best not to expose them… Basically, to make things easier stay in doors and watch “Baywatch” if you feel like going to the beach, or go at night time and have a cocktail instead. Getting drunk is ok no matter your skin color !!

Taking a new born baby to the beach is more or less the same but worse.

If you are like me, not following the “red haired beach rules” you spend your summer looking like a red lobster and chilling down with yogurt on your body and potatoes on your shoulders hoping to look normal again within hours and start the roasting session again in the morning. When you have baby, as you’re not sure how to take care of yourself, you avoid taking the risk with him and so you basically just don’t go to the beach because he’ll never be too protected (so you think) and the day light only will (so you think as well) burn him for life… And so you keep him indoors like Dracula until the sun goes down.

Should try the mountains instead…

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Taking some (me) time off

11 Jul

Since March 6th, I’ve had little time for myself. Long showers, lunch, diner, coffee and drinks on a terrace in the rain or in the sun, proper shopping days, a stroll, an expo, a bus ride, all – stroller free – is something these days that I sometimes (really really) miss and get on (too) rare occasions !! I’ve even been to my physiotherapist on several occasions one hand on the stroller pushing it back and forth during the session… Not very relaxing when you’re there to do just that. So yes, life has changed dramatically and I came to the conclusion that my life is no longer my own and probably won’t be for the next 18 years… or 35 in case I’m pretty unlucky !!

We’ve been in Ile de Ré for the past 7 days, relaxing in the sun as much as possible. Yesterday morning I woke up at 6.30am, not for the baby but for the dog who was moaning in his corner a bit too early for his time. I got up, fed the dog, took him out, waited for the baby to wake up, fed him, changed him, put him back to bed and fell back into mine. Somewhere between 8.30 and 9am hubby got out of bed, took dog and baby out for a walk and I went back to sleep for almost 2 full hours… I wish I could sign up for this every day !!
Today, I didn’t get that lucky but at least both baby and dog slept till 8.15am.

One thing I hated in the first couple of months when baby arrived was being (constantly) told that taking a morning shower was something I should easily be able to do and it seemed “strange” I had such a hard time finding a moment to do so. Also, that I should make it a rule to nap whenever baby did… It’s a great idea in theory, it really is, and it probably works for some, I’m sure. However, while some manage this very well, others cannot sleep on command as easily as you probably do and napping less then, in my case, at least a couple of hours, puts them in an awfully bad mood when they wake up. Plus you’ve got the quite unexpected “housewife” scene going on when you have a baby, something you didn’t see coming at all ; washing, folding and putting away the never ending laundry (I truly thought that daily washing was an urban legend, but as it turns out, it is not !!), you find yourself constantly cleaning baby bottles (so you go out and buy enough to keep you going for 3 full days yet it never stops), unless you go on a hunger strike or spend your new life as a new mummy out in town, lunch will not prepare itself and if it was a pleasure to cook before it now becomes an obligation to avoid you from dropping from size 40 to 34 in a week.. By the time your food is ready, baby wakes up again and by the time you can actually get around to eating it, it’s dinner time so you start all over again.

Right now I can gladly say that while I’m writing this (I did start this 3 days ago but I’m getting closer to the “publish” button by the word now) hubby is playing with the baby, the dog is asleep… (actually hubby may have fallen asleep next to baby… It just got awfully quiet in the house all of a sudden) and I’ve got some time to look myself up close in the mirror and catch up…

So this is how it goes eh !? They should add this on the pregnancy test along with the 2 pink lines :

Pregnant*

*This is where your “life does no longer belong to you” start ! Enjoy your next 8 months to the full !! Trust us !!

I do have to say though that baby Hugo is really damn cute… A pain at times like every other baby on planet earth is I believe, but he’s quite cute and even though, after all this time I’m still not fully aware that he is “mine”, I wouldn’t mind keeping him a few more years see how he’ll turn out.. At least until he’s 18th… Or his 35th !!

Birth of a new mother…

7 Jul

It’s been 4 months and 1 day today that I have experienced life as a (new) mother. Actually it’s been 123 days to be more exact and according to “Petit Bateau”, or 3 months and 28 days or 17 weeks… It all depends what country you live, but at the end of the day, it’s been 4 months that my life, as I’ve known it for the past 38 years, has changed completely !

I have shared (quite a few) bad and good moments with whoever was willing to listen through Facebook, Twitter, email, phone calls, SMS chats, over drinks, over dinners and random discussions started with random people in the streets (well, I didn’t stalk and stop people simply to have a chat about my baby and the fact that I was going mad, just to get that clear !!). I have received so much support from my family and friends, people I barely know and total strangers… Honestly, I must say that without them and all their patience and kind words I would have probably lost it a long time ago, left man, dog and baby and fled to some far away beach to tan and drink tequila morning to night… (… I’m still considering the beach but the tequila has now given place to Cosmopolitan… lighter and drunk-friendly).

Anyhow, after 4 months of “how do I change a diaper ? how do I give him meds ? how do I get him to sleep ? How do I survive ? how can I make some (me) time for a quick shower more than twice a week or at midnight ? how can I make him stop crying / scream / wake up at night / wake up at day / move around when I want him to sit still and sit still when he wants to move around ; I felt the need to start writing again and share some of my experience with, again, whoever wants to read it…

I received messages from people telling me that my posts have helped them, friends or relatives to overcome or better accept these particularly tough moments, as it is true that you DO feel all alone in the world with a new baby in your life even if you’re well surrounded, that you know you’re the billionth woman to do this since the beginning of the world and that your neighbor next door is experiencing exactly the same thing at exactly the same time… it feels f*%ù* lonely !!! Apparently, from what I’ve been told, I also seem to say out loud what some others won’t because it’s either not politically correct to say how bad, sad (and selfish ?) you feel with a new baby in your life (even desired) and how good, happy and complete you don’t… I never had a hard time saying what I feel. At times it’s good at times it may not be, but in this particular case, speaking out seems like the right to do. Some may like it and some won’t and I apologize in advance for those of you who may take my words as harsh or unfair.

Just to make things clear though… I am happy to have Hugo as I’ve wanted him for a while now. I never felt though, to be honest, a proper “need” to have a baby but it did seem the right thing to do, having the right man in my life and being at an age where if I would have waited much longer, I may have regretted it later on… So yes, Hugo was a desired baby, yet, despite the fact people warn you that “your life will change forever”, you are absolutely not prepared for what actually comes once he arrives !! You think you’re a tough person and that you can handle more or less anything that happens to you ?… Having a baby may prove you wrong !! (and to all you women who didn’t feel this negative overwhelming and tsunami-like emotions once your baby was born, I must say – you are my heroes !!)

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Adopt a man with Handicaps !

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A city girl in the French Southern country… Again

16 Aug

One may assume a city girl needs her city-comfort when taken out of her usual habitat and placed into a green area invisible on most maps, or else she may turn yellow along with nature. Try this (for their safety, please keep children away from this post) ;…

So… Take a city girl out of her natural busy and structured habitat and place her in a destructed, reconstructed country home where rubles have replaced lawns, stones used as stairs and where toilets and bathrooms are standing proudly with no roof nor all 4 walls intact… 

Give her a lantern at night to help her hold her toothbrush in hand and help her find her own two feet. Give her a mop at day to help her sweep the floors and walls in case of nightly rain and don’t forget an extra pack of toilet paper if the others, left outside, have turned into wet sponges…

Take her out to lunch in a fabulous spot overlooking the lake and the mountains. Then take her out for a walk… Let her climb the Gorge-du-Verdon in the rain, wearing nothing but a light city dress and slippery rubber city shoes that will end in hubby’s hands, holding on to her little city pouch for dear life as she faces, barefoot, slippery stones, worms and other bugs that shouldn’t even be mentioned ! The only difference between her and Indiana Jones was Steven Spielberg running after Harrison Ford with a camera on his shoulder screaming “wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care Harry”…

Gorge du Verdon

Gorge du Verdon

Si non, in the country side, the Mediterranean one in any case which is probably my favorite green shiny area, one can also harvest lavender. You cut it, collect it, smell it, sit by the pool and assemble it into small bouquets that you will then let dry for a month. before decorating your city home with. There’s nothing better than fresh lavender smell…

Fresh lavender

Fresh lavender

Once she got back to her everyday city life, she started (strangely enough) missing her Southern country (and it must be said, her friends that go with it)… And so the city girl has decided to take her bag out and pack all over again. A second trip to the country side is starting tomorrow…

Lavender

Lavender

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